To the Mom who decided that I wasn’t fast enough to run with her, that I couldn’t keep up.  Who decided that she didn’t want to run with me anymore after my first time.. shame on you!  Thankfully, I am the most stubborn person I know besides my oldest daughter. You could have really done some damage.

Your post on the Facebook Group was looking for moms who might be interested in running. You mention your previous speed but I didn’t read anything stating I must be able to keep up.  I joined your running group because I really wanted to meet moms in the neighbourhood and I really wanted start running, something I had never done before!

What I did read in your post was “post partum”.  Post partum, which in my opinion mrunningeans that you’ve had a child and that you are a mother.  To me, a mother is supportive, generally patient and nurturing.   You seemed to be these things when you very kindly walked with me when I needed to, and even when I insisted that you go ahead. I told you I’d catch up but you continued to walked with me. You told me I was doing good, and encouraged me. I left that evening determined that by the next run, I’d be able to keep up, that it wouldn’t be me that slows you ladies down because I really wanted to run with you!

We met up on August 31st and I openly admitted, I’d never gone for a run before. I also admitted that I was a smoker for 15+ years and have been smoke free for 3 years now. I also openly admitted that my goal was to be able to play with my girls again! I left that night determined, my legs HURT, my head throbbed and I could barely catch my breathe and the phrase,”Hurts so good!” came to mind. I was proud.  I cried.  I planned my next run. It poured rain the next day so I held back and went running the next day.  With two girls in tow we hit the streets for a run, I was a little bit better! I felt amazing. I was so proud. I got home and that evening you squashed it!

“I really want to do more speed than what we did the other night.”

“I only get the chance to go out once a week so I want to make it as good of a workout as I can.”

Those words you messaged me, they stung!  Your words have sat heavily on my shoulders ever since! I understand wanting to make the most out of your time, I do! However, I do not understand not even giving me a chance! It hurt a lot actually and I feel that if that was someone else other than me, your rejection would have been even more harmful.

Someone else wouldn’t be as determined as me, someone else might have let your words sit so heavily on their shoulders that they could have given up on running. Saturday September 10th, I ran 5km by myself in 30 minutes, just 10 days after my initial run with you. That very first day, I ran 2.24km in 23minutes and 30 seconds. That improvement is crazy and I am damn proud of myself!

To that lady who wouldn’t let me run with her anymore.. shame on you! If you had actually just gave me one more chance, the conversation we had wouldn’t have been necessary and you would have made one helluva friend, your loss!  But at the same time I thank you because it inspired my determination even further but also showed me the type of runner I never want to be.

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